Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Carrying it on

Throughout the years, it has become a habit for me to ask God in my prayers to reveal to me his perfect will for my life. A habit that was passed onto me from my parents that has paid great results and avoided lots of unnecesary headaches.
Two weeks ago, I had to go to the U.S. consulate to get my working visa renewed. I brought all the important papers, the same ones I had brought on the several different previous ocassions, and I was very confident that I was going to get it as usual. To my surprise, the consulate officer denied it for no apparent reason. It really hit me hard and right away all sort of thoughts began to rush through my head. What am I going to do now? Will I find a nice job in Panama? and so many other very much important questions. I sort of got depressed and by the end of the day, I couldn't take it no more. I was feeling real bad and hopeless and only then, I did realize that I had shifted the trust I am to put in God onto me. Almost without realizing about it, I stop trusting God and being thankful for everything in all, and of course it lead me to depresion and hopelessness. So after realizing my wrong approach to the situation I decided to thank God for this and I started to pray that His will might be done in my life, and that no matter what the result, he would give me peace of mind and heart to accept whatever it was, for the Scripture reassures me that everthing works for good. I felt how , during two weeks after the day I got my visa denied, my faith was getting centered in God. There were so many things involved, at times, they would get into my head and won't let me go, and then I would just brush them out of my head and praise God. Finally, yesterday I went again to the U.S. consulate and brought some extra documents I didn't bring the first time and I got the visa approved this time around. As I was sitting on that chair waiting for my name to be called, I prayed once again and I said "Lord, may your will be done" I felt in peace and I was aware that from that moment onwards my life could have changed 360 degrees, and yet I was peaceful. That could only be the work of Christ in the life of anyone. I praise the Lord, for today like never before, I can tell with all security that I am still walking within His will for my life. Ever since last year I would ask God if he still wanted me to be working on the ships and yesterday I heard his voice loud and clear. When the consulate officer said "yes, I will give you the visa", that was God talking to me "yes, I still want you on the ships". Many of my friends and family constantly ask me if I am sure about being on the ships, and they would ask me all sort of question about my future. They care about me I guess, and am thankful for that, but as long as I walk where God wants me to walk, then I am happy and feel 100% secured. On one ocassion, several months ago, a friend of mind who is not believer, asked me "why are you on the ships, if you don't do all sort of worldly things? I told him, if there were not believers on the ships, then, who would tell you about Christ's love and sacrifice? My prayer is that during the days or years ahead of me on the ships, may I always be up to spread the Good News to all.

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